I will sing for the meek
Those who pray with their very lives for peace
Though they’re in chains for a higher call
Their mourning will change into laughter
When the nations fall
In spirit poor and mercy rich
They hunger for your righteousness
Their hearts refined in the purity
Lord let me shine for them
Lord let me sing
Lord let me shine for them
Lord let me sing
I can hardly even come up with a way to begin this post. In only 24 hours, the Lord has grabbed my heart and stirred up a commotion so unfathomable within… It is beyond words. He has brought me to my knees. These lyrics come from a song by Caedmon’s Call entitled “I Will Sing/Hope to Carry on [Live].” I listened to the CD while I was at the gym today and I almost had to step off of the treadmill because it so touched my heart. I have spent the entire last two days on the verge of tears, not because of sadness or despair, but due to the powerful movement going on in my heart. I know that revival is temporary and hard times will come—we can’t always be on the hilltops because the spiritual high is so shallow. I need to dig my roots firmly into the Word so I have a foundation to stand on when the spiritual storms come. But I find it hard to resist wishing I could stay on this hilltop forever!
I’m probably taking on too much when it comes to my reading material, but at this point I am pretty much spending all of my free time with God. I am reading “The Love Dare,” and the accompanying book, “Night Light” by Jim Dobson (?), Spurgeon’s “Morning and Evening,” John Bunyan’s “Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners,” and S. Thomas Aquinas “On Prayer and the Contemplative Life,” and of course, the Bible. That’s quite a load, lol. And let me tell you, that Love Dare book really hit’s hot issues. The very first day dealt with patience. They just jumped right in there, lol. The dare was “For the next day, resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse at all. If the temptation arises, choose not to say anything. It is better to hold your tongue than to say something you’ll regret. (James 1:19)”
Boy was that hard!! It’s easy to not even notice the little demeaning things you might say or think of your wife or husband. Of course I didn’t just wake up and start cursing Arron out today, but even little things like getting angry when he was rushing me out the door to go to the gym, or refraining from saying “honey can you not put trash in the sink?” or “baby please don’t pick the cat up and throw him across the room just because his meowing is getting on your nerves.” Nothing negative AT ALL. That can get really hard!! But it is so rewarding because it teaches you to pick and choose your battles which is inVALuable in a deep and fulfilling marriage! Now obviously, later on, throwing the cat will probably be a battle I do choose to fight, but gently tossing the cat, no. Kitteh’s are pretty tough. But trash in the sink? Not worth my marriage. And that’s a phrase I’ve come to repeat over and over again: “is it worth your marriage?” 99% of the time, no it’s not worth my marriage.
I’m so excited too, because 1 or 2 times Arron has shown interest in what I was reading. I’m trying to not shove this whole thing down his throat, but sometimes I just get SO excited and I just have to share what I’m learning with SOMEONE, and he’s right there! The first day of Night Light was so sweet and heart wrenching today, and he read it with me. Now we say “Shmily” to each other J
Well, today has been quite a day, filled with God-hugs, and I am ready to hit the hay. Though I’m not sure I’ll be able to sleep tonight due to excitement about what amazing things the Lord will teach me tomorrow!